3 Years 7 Months Update: Reaching a Milestone!

• Self-Maintenance
• Happy Birthday and 2^nd Anniversary
• Ralf’s First Bikepacking Event

Foreword
This is always such a difficulty situation: I really want to post updates more often, especially when a lot of events happen in such short period of time. However, the most recent event (and this one shook me to my very the core), I never saw coming. I have been in flight-or-fight mode over the past month, and I just couldn’t get myself to do the reflection necessary for updating my blog. I guess part of it is denial, not mentally ready to deal with what happened.

So, I decided to separate two significant events that started/happened recently: one is a personal milestone for Ralf and me, the other one is of the most detrimental, evil nature that I have ever experienced (besides a cancer diagnosis). So, let me focus on the positive in this update, since this milestone deserves to be featured without being contaminated by evil. I hopefully will be able to post the next update in a week or so. As always, baby-steps…

Self-Maintenance

My hip has been sore, and I can feel the scar tissue burning and pulling deep inside my thigh. I have been using a myofascial massage roller, and PT used a Gastron “scraper” to break up more tissue. Bruising is expected, I suppose, but it makes it awkward to go to the pool for rehab swimming… But I am still making progress, my range of motion is improving, and PT has gotten me on the right track for recovery.

I concluded the last update with a preview of the IV Lounge project. Ralf has had a lot of issues with staying hydrated and getting certain nutrition because his diet has been restrictive in many ways, and his GI system doesn’t function normally anymore. So, we looked into IV hydration/supplementation. In my time as ED nurse, I witnessed first hand how a liter of fluid administered IV could “perk up” a sick patient, especially in cases with underlying GI issues. When I saw a dear friend post about her great experience with the IV Lounge, we decided to give it a try. Covid numbers had been improving, so the benefit was worth the risk at this time. Ralf and I are an item, and I am always game if it helps my mate get better. Besides, the couple that infuses together, stays together, right?

But seriously, we are both very hopeful that adding IV infusions to Ralf’s (and my) monthly maintenance program would be another angle to improve our health. I admit, I have started many IVs in other people, but I am actually quite phobic of needles myself.  Getting poked on purpose took me some courage, but I am getting better with that. We have done weekly infusions over the past month, which entailed one liter of normal saline with added electrolytes, amino acids, vitamins, and minerals. Especially for Ralf, this appears to be a promising intervention, so we signed up for a couples membership to see where it goes. Expensive? Yes. Worth to enhance quality of life? Absolutely.

Happy Birthday and 2^nd Anniversary

October 21^st marked Ralf’s birthday and our 2^nd year Anniversary. The evil that already entered my life the week before did unfortunately contaminate this time of celebration a bit, but it was still a great day. This day marks the birth of a survivor, who has overcome the impossible, and despite all the curve balls, uncertainty, and pain, he never gave up.

Our landlord doesn’t allow pets, and even though we talked about the possibility of adopting a new furry son or daughter, that will have to wait until we find a new home. In the meantime, I got Ralf a Tribble. Since I introduced him to the wonderful world of Star Trek, I believe this is the perfect first furry pet. We named him Kelvin, and when you touch him, he shakes and purrs. I am glad though that we didn’t end up with a house filled with Tribbles while we were gone on the upcoming trip – and it actually makes me feel a little old when I realize that many people I know will have no clue as to what a Tribble is.

Ralf’s First Bikepacking Event
After relentless planning, prepping, troubleshooting, and reassurances, Ralf finally attended his very first bikepacking event since his cancer diagnosis: the River-to-Sea Loop, which was a three-day, 200 miles bicycle ride, mostly off road, and with long stretches “off the beaten path”. The event started in Seville (30 minutes North of DeLand), to Palatka, to St Augustine, and then back to Seville. Ralf had done such rides in the past, and he'd made great friends who he hasn't seen for a very long time. One of the reasons why I decided to come along and book hotels along the River-to-Sea route was to bring all the specific food items and medical supplies that Ralf needs every day to function. His routine needs to happen in a certain order and requires a lot of time. That’s why he couldn’t go camping with the group this time around. But you know what? It didn’t take away anything from this experience, and he ended up riding the entire course. I couldn’t be more proud if I tried.

Starting Point/Day 1: DeLand/Seville to Palatka
After a visit to the IV Lounge for “pre-hydration”, we made it to DeLand on the evening of October 21 (Ralf’s birthday & our anniversary). We checked into the hotel, the first time in years, and got ready to meet a dear friend and his awesome wife, Brian & Kim, for a nice dinner. On a side note, when we entered the parking lot of the hotel, we passed a car that was parked there and caught my eye. I guess being from Europe, I am still amazed when I see stuff like that, so I had to take a picture…

After a very nice dinner with our friends, we walked back to the hotel to get Ralf’s strict evening and morning regimen set up. We both had to get up at 4 AM in order to be ready in time. We were pretty nervous because this was the first time since his cancer surgery in 2019 that Ralf had been away from home overnight. But even though it wasn’t perfect, it worked out. When we left the hotel, the lobby was still completely deserted, and even the coffee place wasn’t open yet.

It took us about 30 minutes to get to the starting point in Seville. Our GPS routed us to the wrong place at first, but since that happened to 90% of the other riders as well, we didn’t feel so bad, lol. After someone called the organizer, we got some clarification and the group caravanned to the right spot, which was about five minutes away. One by one, cars loaded with bikes arrived, and everyone was busy setting up their gear and getting ready for take-off.

You know, going through what Ralf has been going through is bad enough, but the isolation due to Covid had certainly added to the mess. That made this event even more meaningful, and my heart was full when I watched him assemble his bike, saying “hello” to old friends, and getting ready with the group to start this new adventure.

And at last, the River-to-Sea 2021 is officially on the way!

After the group had left, I got into the Element, put on the “Red Hot Chili Peppers”, and drove towards Palatka to check into the hotel at check point 1. I had Ralf’s tracker on my phone, so I was able to see where he was at (approximately) and gauge an estimated time of arrival.

The group was supposed to meet at a Beef O’Brady’s, just across from the St. John's River bridge that leads to Palatka. I joined the group for (an outside) dinner before picking up Ralf and his bike for the evening routine.

After we got to the hotel, Ralf took a shower and completed his Avazzia (electrocurrent) abdominal treatment. When I looked over to ask him a question, he was already out…

Second Day: Palatka to St. Augustine
After another early morning, Ralf was ready to start the second leg of the journey. It takes a lot of do his routine, along with all the planning and packing/unpacking to keep organized, but it went better than expected.

Getting to the second starting point was a lot more adventurous than Seville – even without getting lost. The deal was to meet the group at a trailhead parking lot in the middle of the Etoniah Creek State Forest. Besides the lack of paved roads, it was still pitch-black, completely remote, and given that it was the week before Halloween, pretty spooky. As we were bumping along on the washedboarded gravel at snail-speed, movies like the “Chainsaw Massacre” came to mind…. But I am happy to report that we didn’t encounter any werewolves or mass murderers, and after three miles deep into the woods, we found the trail head.

After we pulled into the parking lot, Ralf got to work, setting up his bike and gear again. We still had to wait for the group to assemble, since the other riders were camping in a nearby primitive camp site and needed to get ready as well.

While he was busy doing that, I took a stroll around the trailhead to see where were are actually at. Funny enough, werewolves were not as common as bears here, so in hindsight, I am glad we didn’t run into one of those furry guys on the way.

After everyone was accounted for, Ralf rode off with the group to the next check point: St. Augustine.

Meanwhile, I put the address for the next hotel into the GPS to get to St. Augustine myself. But first, I had to make my way back to civilization. Slowly at first, very slowly, until I had pavement again under the wheels… at least now it was full daylight, which took away feeling of being part of a horror movie.

I made it to St. Augustine by mid-morning, and it was BUSY! I didn’t realize that it was not just tourist season but also homecoming weekend. I couldn’t check into the hotel until the later afternoon, so I parked in the hotel’s parking lot, changed into shorts and sandals, and walked into town. I have been here before, many years ago with Ralf, my mom, and Karl-Heinz, I believe. But this time, it felt a lot more “touristy” to me. I walked to the famous Castillo de San Marcos National Monument but after I saw the line, decided to just sit by the water and listen to some music for a while. My anxiety and panic attacks were still there, even though I tried hard to put it away.

I kept checking on Ralf’s progress on his tracking app, and I still had a lot of time before we were going to meet at the Ice Plant Restaurant and Bar later that evening. So walked through the “old town” section of St. Augustine, ate some lunch, explored the residential areas, and talked to my friend Sharon on the phone.

I finally got to check into the hotel, freshen up, and walk about a mile to the Ice Plant to meet with Ralf. Due to the amount of traffic and people, it appeared more logical to walk a mile, rather than taking the Element. A wise choice, as it turned out.

Ralf finally made it to the restaurant around 7 PM. However, he was very beat, and there were just too many people at this place. So, we decided to skip dinner and walk straight back to the hotel. And as it often happens: you keep on going until you relax, then you crash. That’s what kind of happened to Ralf. I ended up ordering pizza through DoorDash, and after he ate, it was again “lights out”. That was until a MASSIVE muscle cramp in Ralf’s right calf disturbed the night, I mean, that was a bad one! Thank goodness for the mustard packages I took from the previous hotel. Ralf guzzled down two packs, and the cramp finally let go. Yes, mustard is a remedy for these kind of muscle cramps, and so far, that always worked.

Third Day: St. Augustine back to Seville

The last early morning of the River-to-Sea had arrived. Given that we had no idea how staying in hotels and managing Ralf’s medical routine would work out away from home, I was so incredible proud of him for what he already had achieved. It hasn’t been easy, but being able to ride in this event so far exceeded our expectations.

We left the hotel to get to the last meeting point, about 20 minutes away. Ralf looked tired but also happy…

The last check point wasn’t’ very scenic. In fact, it was a tiny Subway plaza right off the main road. After we arrived, Subway was still closed for another 30 minutes, which sucked because we both needed to pee. For the last time, Ralf took out the bike and got his gear ready. The group was again camping at a nearby campground, but at this point, riders would take off for the final destination without assembling as a whole group. So when three of Ralf’s friends arrived, the four of them decided to take off, in order to make back to Seville by daylight.

Me, I waited another 10 minutes for Subway to open to go pee, then I had to kill some time. It was only 9 AM, and because there wasn’t another hotel to check in, I decided to explore a state park near Palatka. It was only a 45 minute ride, and I read online that the Ravine Garden State Park was nice.

When I got there, I tried to take a power nap, but my anxiety was not letting me rest. So I did what I did before: I put in my headphones, turned on some music, and power-walked the 2-mile trail – twice! I also explored some of the many side-trail and climbed down to the bottom of this enormous sinkhole to walk around some more. It was actually really nice, even though I was now sweaty and grimy.

Now it was time to get close to Seville to wait for Ralf’s arrival. My internet connection was rather spotty, and I had a hard time getting an update on Ralf’s tracker app. So I drove to the nearest place before Seville, where I could get a snack and wait. That turned out to be a Winn-Dixie, where I got some food and water for myself, and also for Ralf. After collecting him, we still had to drive 1 ½ hours back home.

I must say, I was very proud when I gestimated my arrival so perfectly that Ralf and I arrived exactly at the same time. He was still with the same group of friends, which made me very happy.

He was tired, beat, and his behind was most certainly hurting. But he DID IT! Halfway home, he snoozed off – well deserved, I must say.

Words cannot describe how proud I am of this man! From being given a death sentence, to surviving a morbid surgery and hot chemo treatment, 16 days at Moffitt Cancer Center, countless setbacks, ED visits in the middle of the pandemic, being let down by healthcare providers left and right, let alone the mental agony of processing it all and still press on, Ralf has fought through it all. He is setting an impressive example of perseverance and strength.

With that being said, the evil that has disrupted our lives has already impacted us, mentally and physically. I have to make some tough decisions very soon to protect my family. But that is for next update.